Title: LIPSTICK AND LIES AND DEADLY GOODBYES
Series: Vampire Housewife #1
Author: Jodi Vaughn
Publisher: Jodi Vaughn
Publish Date: 10.29.2019
Category /Genre: Paranormal Romance
Recommended for: 18+ due to sexual content
Grammar/editing: received as an
unedited ARC
Received from: Jodi Vaughn
Goodreads link: Lipstick and Lies and Deadly Goodbyes
Date completed: 11.02.2019
Description from the publisher:
Ever been almost-beheaded by a snowplow?
Turned into an undead by a homeless
vampire? Cheated and betrayed by your
lying sack of s**t husband? Welcome to
my life… or, more correctly, my crazy after-life.
To everyone behind the gates of our wealthy community in Charming, Mississippi, my husband and I were the Joneses everyone tried to keep up with. A beautiful house, the perfect gated community, two gorgeous kids, and a supposedly flawless marriage.
Until I came home and caught him rolling around in our bed, hip-deep in my best friend.
Which led to the aforementioned snow plow incident. I woke up with a fear of the sun and a propensity for drinking blood. Or in laymen’s terms, a vampire.
I thought vampires were supposed to be hot and irresistible. But my Maker smells like he just stepped out of a sewer and he has the appeal of a turd in a punch bowl.
But you know how life is as one of the Joneses...gotta keep up. Keep up appearances, that is.
I’ve swapped my Triple, Venti, Sugar-Free, Non-Fat Caramel Macchiato for a stainless steel rambler that keeps my O-Negative at the perfect room temperature. I can still manage the carpool lane, with the right sunglasses to hide my crazy eyes. But between daytime soccer games, a missing college student who might have been a vampire kill, trying not to drain my soon-to-be-ex-husband, and keeping my neighbors in the dark, I’m shaking in my Jimmy Choos. I'm not sure I can do this.
My name is Rachel Jones, and I’m a vampire housewife
To everyone behind the gates of our wealthy community in Charming, Mississippi, my husband and I were the Joneses everyone tried to keep up with. A beautiful house, the perfect gated community, two gorgeous kids, and a supposedly flawless marriage.
Until I came home and caught him rolling around in our bed, hip-deep in my best friend.
Which led to the aforementioned snow plow incident. I woke up with a fear of the sun and a propensity for drinking blood. Or in laymen’s terms, a vampire.
I thought vampires were supposed to be hot and irresistible. But my Maker smells like he just stepped out of a sewer and he has the appeal of a turd in a punch bowl.
But you know how life is as one of the Joneses...gotta keep up. Keep up appearances, that is.
I’ve swapped my Triple, Venti, Sugar-Free, Non-Fat Caramel Macchiato for a stainless steel rambler that keeps my O-Negative at the perfect room temperature. I can still manage the carpool lane, with the right sunglasses to hide my crazy eyes. But between daytime soccer games, a missing college student who might have been a vampire kill, trying not to drain my soon-to-be-ex-husband, and keeping my neighbors in the dark, I’m shaking in my Jimmy Choos. I'm not sure I can do this.
My name is Rachel Jones, and I’m a vampire housewife
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
LIPSTICK AND LIES AND DEADLY
GOODBYES is the first book in the Vampire
Housewife series. As this one
establishes who is who, it does need to be read first. Whether the rest need to be read in the order
of publication is yet to be determined.
Rachel is a yuppie mommy and she is
having a mega-bad-day. Instead of
surprising her hubby with wonderful birthday gifts, she walks in on him and her
best friend. Then, the real troubles
begin. Now, she has to figure out a
completely new after-life while keeping the neighbors clueless.
The story is funny (Her maker smells
like a skunk, but calls her Roadkill!), but still empathetic and sympathetic to
the plight of a woman who is mother and jilted wife.
This is just the beginning of what
could be a truly fantastic series. I
hope this author can keep up the wit and the sarcasm.
Note: While I received this book as a gifted ARC
via Booksprout, my opinions are my own and are given freely.
Vampire
Housewife series:
1.
Lipstick and Lies and Deadly
Goodbyes
2.
Merlot and Divorce and Deadly
Remorse
3.
Bullets and Booze and Dead Suede
Shoes
Also from Jodi Vaughn:
·
Witch with an Attitude
Cloverton
Series:
1. Lost Without You
2. Lost All Control
3. Christmas in Cloverton
Cloverton
Holiday Short stories:
1. Candy Corn Kisses
2. Candy Canes and Tractor Chains
Rise of the
Arkansas Werewolves Series:
1.
By the Light of the Moon
2.
Beneath a Blood Lust Moon
3.
Desires of a Full Moon
4.
Darkside of the Moon
5.
Shadows of a Wolf Moon
5.5 Secrets of a Silver Moon
6.
Fall of a Blood Moon
7.
Rise of an Alpha Moon
8.
Rise of an Alpha Moon: Volume Two
9.
Rise of an Alpha Moon: Volume Three
9.5 Shimmer of a Celtic Moon
10.
Killian’s Moon
Somewhere,
TX Series:
1.
Saddle Up
2.
Trouble in Texas
3.
Bad Medicine
4.
Somewhere in Paradise
Veiled
Series:
1.
Veiled Secrets
2.
Veiled Enchantment
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